Seiretei's oldest virgin
by Aleia15
Summary: By the time it crossed Abarai Renji's mind to think about sex for the first time, he was close to his second century. RenjiIchigo


Title: Seiretei's oldest virgin

Pairing: Renji/Ichigo

Genre: Romance, humour, First time

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: First time--like real awkward, painful and uncomfortable first time.

**Seiretei's Oldest Virgin**

By the time it crossed Abarai Renji's mind to think about sex for the first time, he was close to his second century. It wasn't even his fault: he was a late bloomer, and that in Soul Society's time meant you were way too old to be a virgin.

He had reasons for this. First off, a guy was always to busy trying to survive in the 78th district of Rukongai to think with his prick. And he had to survive and get out of there; for himself, and for Rukia, and for all the fallen friends they left behind.

After that, training to become a shinigami wasn't exactly easy. And even if it was true that most of the students had their first experiences in the Academy, Renji was too preoccupied trying to excel and get away from the Rukongai stench that seemed to follow him. And trying to impress Rukia. Let's not forget that.

And then--well, then Kuchiki Byakuya happened.

The first time he saw Kuchiki Byakuya, Renji realized why he hadn't thought about sex at all, even while trying to make Rukia acknowledge his strength. He wasn't trying to impress her so she would fall in love with him, as Kira was always teasing him; he was trying to be the cool older brother.

Just one look at Byakuya, and Renji was painfully aware of many things. The most shocking of them was that he had no idea how to deal with the tingling feeling spreading through his limbs to a part of his body he had been sure had no use whatsoever.

He was almost a hundred years old it was too late to ask anyone. They would laugh him right out of the Gotei 13.

So Renji ignored that he had ever had a libido, and worked as hard as he could to surpass Kuchiki Byakuya. He needed to surpass his captain to be able to look Rukia in the eye. That's what he told himself; and after decades of training and working under the man, it became the truth.

Those were the reasons he was still a virgin, even if he was approaching his second century.

He had never even remembered his prick had another use until the first time Kurosaki Ichigo almost kicked his arse. He had been thinking, on their way back to Seiretei, that it was a pity his captain killed such a nice piece of arse. It was at that exact moment when Renji realized how screwed he was.

Not that he had any intention to explain that to the boy staring intently at him.

…

It had all started with an innocent question--or not so innocent considering it had been Keigo the one to come up with it. Or was it Mizuru? He could never remember correctly the names of those two.

There wasn't much for them to do during the daytime while waiting for Aizen to make his move, so they had to attend school like Kurosaki and the rest of the guys. Lunch time seemed to be the most important time of the day, and the shinigami tagged along trying to adapt to human behaviour.

It wasn't just Ichigo and his band of Ryokas now; there were other friends with them at those times. There were Keigo and Mizuru, who seemed to be obsessed with Matsumoto's assets, and where in serious risk of being frozen to death by Hitsugaya. There were also some girls with Orihime and Rukia, Arisawa and a couple of quiet girls, and a loud stalker that was always trying to grope Orihime. And was, more often than not, kicked for her efforts. Renji didn't understand it at all.

It was during one of those lunches that the question arose.

"So, Kurosaki, have you done it already?" Keigo--or was it Mizuru?--asked with a side glance at Rukia, who was with the girls eating a bit further back.

Ichigo turned beet red and muttered something that sounded like, "Not your fucking business, Keigo."

The other boy, who he now knew was Mizuru, just laughed and shook his head. "Ignore him, Kurosaki, he just wants to gloat he has finally done it with a girl."

It was now Keigo's turn to blush, but he looked happy and proud of himself at the same. Renji just thought he looked stupid.

"I would have thought," Keigo continued, enjoying being the centre of attention, "that as close as you are to Orihime and Kuchiki-san, the only virgin around would be Toushirou."

All the boys, except Hitsugaya, shivered at the sudden temperature drop.

And then, Renji did a double take. "Wait--how old are you again?" he asked, amazed. Kids in the living world sure were fast.

He saw the same realization enter Ikkaku's and Yumichika's eyes. And Hitsugaya's frosty expression had a note of amazement on it. Those guys were too young by their standards.

"So, Hitsugaya-kun," Mizuru was saying, looking at him. "You have been with a woman before, then."

His eyes strayed for a fraction of second to Matsumoto, only to scowl darkly immediately afterwards. But the shinigami had already seen, and that made Renji realize how far behind he was on everything.

It wouldn't have mattered, Renji thought later while trying not to fall asleep in class, if Ichigo wasn't close to him all day long now. It felt as if he was walking with a hard on most of the time. Renji wasn't used to that and he didn't now how to deal with it, so he was cranky.

"That bastard Keigo!" Ichigo grumbled on their way home from school; the rest of their friends had decided to go somewhere else sensing his bad mood, so it was just Renji and Ichigo going back to the clinic. "I have other things to think about than girls or sex! It's not as if I have time, what with Rukia sleeping in my wardrobe and Arrancars and Vaizars dropping our of nowhere and--"

Renji looked at him and had to stifle a smile. All those reasons sounded so similar to his own that he could have been listening to himself. Not that he had any intention to reveal something that personal to Ichigo. While Ichigo's _condition_ could be considered normal due to his age, Renji's was definitely something best not discussed.

"So, Ichigo," he said, deciding to tease him a bit so he didn't have to think about his own depressing circumstances, "you haven't done anything with Rukia or Orihime?"

Ichigo glared hotly and shut the door to his room with a bit more force than necessary.

"Fuck off, Renji!"

Renji laughed, and sat down on the bed. It was curious how comfortable he felt there when he wasn't thinking about how much he wanted to solve both their problems in that same bed.

"No, seriously," he insisted, completely unperturbed by Ichigo's bad mood, "have you really not considered--"

Ichigo sat down next to him, still glaring, "No," he snapped, "I have not. Orihime is a friend. I've known her for years."

"So?"

Ichigo clenched his fists and stood up, moving to the chair by his desk and straddling it, facing Renji again.

"She's a friend!" he said, exasperated, and Renji's smile widened.

"And what about Rukia?" he asked, his tone light. He was having more fun than he had expected with this, "She sleeps so close to you, and she's cute."

Ichigo scowled. "Wrong fucking Kuchiki." He muttered under his breath, so low Renji thought he had imagined it.

Renji blinked. He had not heard that, had he? He looked at Ichigo again; who was blushing now realizing Renji had indeed heard him.

The mood changed suddenly, both of them aware of it and feeling uncomfortable. Renji could feel a heat spreading in his blood, and tried to think about something else, something different to talk about to distract them.

Nothing came to mind.

The silence stretched, and still Renji and Ichigo stared at each other.

"Fuck!" Renji said finally, unable to stand the stillness anymore, "You and I are really too similar!"

…

Renji was unable to think about anything else for the next two days; his eyes followed Ichigo on their own volition, his mind kept repeating the same words again and again, and his body seemed to be in a state of constant arousal when the other boy was around.

It was ridiculous, he had been perfectly fine before and just a little information had had that effect on him? Ichigo wasn't stupid, he was bound to notice something sooner or later, and that was something he'd rather not have to explain.

On the third day Renji realized it was too late: almost every time his eyes moved to Ichigo it was to find him staring back with a frown.

"Renji, I want to speak to you!" Ichigo called him on their way to lunch on the roof, motioning to the rest of their friends to carry on. Renji waited until they were alone, and then turned to face him.

"What is it?" though he had an idea of what it could be, and he really didn't want to hear it.

"Ummm, well…" Ichigo looked around, suddenly at a loss for words.

Renji waited, folding his arm over his chest and leaning against the wall while Ichigo tried to find the words.

"How old are you, Renji?" he said finally, and Renji blinked surprised. That was not what he had expected.

"I don't know exactly," he said, shrugging, "I guess around a hundred and ninety years."

"So you know about it; you have to." Ichigo's voice was almost a whisper, and Renji didn't need to ask what he was going on about.

Two spots of colour rose on his face, "Well--" How did he explain to Ichigo he didn't know without embarrassing himself and becoming the laughing stock of the school?

He didn't have the chance; Ichigo nodded to himself, as if Renji's hesitation had been an admission. Of what, Renji wasn't sure.

"Today my dad and sisters are taking Rukia to meet my mum, so my house will be empty," he said, "I want you to teach me."

…

That was how he found himself again in Kurosaki Ichigo's room. The house was empty, as Ichigo had promised, and the silence was unnerving him.

It had been a really bad idea to accept.

"So, what do we do now?" Ichigo asked, still looking at him with that focused expression he had in some classes.

What Renji wanted to do was to climb out of the window and run for it, but he couldn't. Their friendship was based in trust and courage, he couldn't be seen a coward. Not here.

He cleared his throat. "We should begin taking off our clothes," he said; even with his lack of experience there were certain things he knew.

Ichigo blushed, but he nodded and standing up started to strip. Renji had seen him before without clothes, that time both of them were training to achieve Bankai and had to use the healing spring, so he wasn't surprised at how attractive Ichigo was.

His body was firm and slender, slightly tanned skin marred by faint scars that gave him a rough edge. His chest was muscled and his arms were thin but strong, the same as his legs. A faint blush was spreading through his face and down his neck, and his cock, nestled in a reddish patch of hair was twitching with interest under Renji's inspection.

Renji blushed.

"Stop staring and take off your fucking clothes!" Ichigo snapped after a few uncomfortable seconds.

Renji did, revealing his own tattooed and already aroused body.

Ichigo looked at him and then arched an eyebrow, "Um, I had the impression you were bigger than me."

His face flaming, Renji glared. "You've grown," he muttered grumpily.

They stood like that, just staring at each other for some time.

"Now what?"

"Now we move to the bed," Renji said, feigning a confidence he was far from feeling, "since it's your first time, it will be more comfortable for you to be on your hands and knees." At least that was something he had heard in the Academy, though at the time he hadn't paid too much attention. Now he whished he did.

"What?" Ichigo was glaring at him, "No way I'm in the bottom!"

It was Renji's turn to glare. "You haven't done this before, and you are the one who wants to learn!"

"But I thought--"

"What?"

Ichigo blushed, and then he shook his head, "Never mind."

He moved to the bed and Renji had a prefect view of that lovely arse, feeling his arousal spiking up and wondering how he was going to do it without revealing how utterly inexperience he was as well. This was a really bad idea.

Renji went after him, climbing on top of the bed and positioning himself behind Ichigo. The mechanics were easy, he just had to stick it into the only available place; he could manage that.

It was a bit cold like this, but well, he had not been expecting romance or flowers.

Ichigo stiffened when Renji's hands grabbed his hips, "Renji--" he began, and then he cried out.

In a second Ichigo had bolted and was in the other side of the room, looking at him accusingly.

"What the fuck? That hurts, Renji!" he shouted, and Renji flushed.

"Well, you are too tense!" Renji countered, chagrined by the other boy's reaction. He had done it right, hadn't he? He hadn't pushed that hard, and he was sure he had hit the target.

Ichigo folded his arms on top of his chest, still glaring. "It fucking hurts, Renji!" he insisted, "What the fuck do you think you're doing trying to stick it out cold?"

"What you asked, you ungrateful bastard!" he said, standing up and mimicking Ichigo's posture, glare and all.

"What I asked?" Ichigo scowled. He advanced on Renji, "It might be my first time, you idiot, but I know about lubrication and preparation. Were you trying to tear me apart?" His voice was loud, and he had a second to be glad they were alone before the words reached his brain.

Lubrication? Preparation? Oh, fuck! He really should have paid more attention.

The light of suspicion entered Ichigo's eyes. "Have you really done this before?"

Renji blushed beet red, "Well--"

"I knew it!" Ichigo threw his hand up in the air and rolled his eyes.

Renji bristled. "What do you mean?" he advanced on Ichigo, his chagrin and arousal forgotten in his mortification and annoyance.

Ichigo stood his ground, completely uncaring of their nudity, "I mean that you have even less experience than me, not to mention common sense!" he said, pointing a finger at Renji's face.

"I never said I did!" he retorted, and then he felt his face heating up when he realized his admission.

Ichigo blinked, stunned. And then he sniggered.

Renji saw red.

"What the fuck? What are you, Seiretei's oldest virgin?"

That was it. Renji was torn between fleeing and attacking, but his pride had already suffered enough to allow an escape. He pounced.

The next minute was a blur of punches and kicks and insults flying all over the room, Renji trying his best to wipe that superior smirk from Ichigo's face blow after blow. Ichigo wasn't passive either; he was giving as much as he got, still laughing and heaping insults on top of Renji.

Renji had him pinned to a wall when the solution to shut his mouth came to him. He pressed his lips against Ichigo's, effectively rendering him silent in the struggle that ensued. Though it could be said it was technically his first kiss, this time it wasn't difficult to figure out how to do it. Renji pushed his tongue past Ichigo's lips, exploring his mouth and tasting him, their tongues tangling up when Ichigo finally gave up and returned the kiss.

The mood changed instantly, their arousal returning with a vengeance while Renji pressed his body to Ichigo's, feeling the heat and the excitement of all that naked skin under him.

Ichigo broke the kiss, moving his mouth to his neck and biting not-too-gently, "This is more like it," he whispered against Renji's throat, and he shivered.

They moved to the bed, stumbling on the debris left by their fight and falling on top of it, their limbs entwined, their mouths searching each other again.

Their kisses and the friction were getting to be a bit too much for Renji, who could see coming another embarrassing moment but was powerless to stop it. And then Ichigo's hand closed over their cocks and started rubbing them together. Renji threw his head back and shouted.

Why had he waited so long to do this?

Ichigo's other hand grabbed his head, and pulled him down for another of those steamy kisses. They were both moving frantically and moaning, trying to reach their climax and at the same time to make it last longer.

It wasn't possible. Renji bit Ichigo's lower lip and felt him stiffening and coming with a cry, his own body responding to sight and feeling of his orgasm.

They stayed like that while they tried to catch their breaths, and then Ichigo pushed Renji off him.

They surveyed the room. It was wrecked.

"We have to clean this before my family returns," Ichigo said, motioning at the ruined room in front of their eyes. He was acting normally, as if nothing had changed and Renji nodded. He didn't know what to say now.

He had known it was a very bad idea since the beginning.

Then Ichigo turned to Renji and smirked. "I think both of us need more practice." And he then looked at the mess they were and grimaced, "maybe after a shower."

Renji laughed, remembering again the reasons he liked Ichigo. They were too similar.

"Yeah, we have much to learn."

…


End file.
